I miss Blogger

I miss writing.

And I obviously am not as good a writer now as I was before because of my laziness. I have a harder time detailing my ideas, constructing sentences, finding appropriate adjectives, and... spelling correctly :<

I think I really have to start writing because all the English-speakers in AdMU make me insecure. I'm part of the Atenean subculture that speaks rough, natural Filipino in all its wonderful glory. XD I mean, I can't speak in English in the lightning-speed others do! I have to pause every now and then to compose my messages... or something.

Okay in a hurry, will TRY t update this.

Nothing major, major

This Blogger account, like my life, is inactive, almost to the point of being dead. But because I refuse to let it go, I update it sporadically :)

So, yes: MY LIFE IS DEAD. I've been on autopilot since last June, but because I have a lazy ass, I don't really mind. I actually enjoy having a routine at the moment. I wake up, go to school, go home, sleep. Sometimes, it's wake up, feel lazy, mull over whether or not I should go to school, decide not to go to school, play video games, then sleep. Yeah, THAT'S MY LIFE. An life of a girl on autopilot. To prove my point, I'm going to be honest: I haven't had a single picture taken since who-knows-when (I'm guessing July). Meaning: nothing memorable enough is happening to me to immortalize it in a picture.

And thinking of how I'm living my life atm makes me a bit tired; I don't want to go into philosophical stuffs (I hate that word so much) right now; but case in point, I know that I'm missing out on a lot. But I don't really care -_____- Oh god, how much more lazy can I get?

But I'm pretty happy! (Oh god... wait, I'm happy being mundane? =_=) What I'm saying is, life's good. It may lack activity, but it's really going smoothly. There are times when I have major, major problems, but my optimism always gets me through. In fact, I'm so surprised at how optimistic I am! When a problem comes, my first thought is always "It's okay, (insert positive statement here)". I swear, I really surprise myself with my optimism. I might surprise you, too. (I noticed that I often freak people out with what I say. That's out of topic, of course - just sharing.)

So that's pretty much it! As I said, I have no pictures to show you, heheh. Oh, and one last thing:

Naiinis na ako dun sa bansang namatayan ng walong sibilyan. Nung inabuso o pinatay ba nila yung mga Pilipinong nagtatrabaho sa kanila, umimik ba tayo? Naging demanding ba tayo? Nung may 3 turistang Pinoy na namatay sa bansa nila, uminit ang ulo natin sa galit? Hindi, di ba? O, bakit ganyan sila ngayon? Bakit lahat tayo sinisisi? Sobrang pikon na pikon na ako sa kanila. Ayoko na magpunta sa bansa nila at baka insultuhin lang nila ako't tapunan ng passport.

Ngayon lang ako nainis na ganito, kasi parang ang bingi't bulag nila. Hinahayaan nilang makonsumo sila ng sarili nilang galit.

Platonic Affection

An amusing thing about my friends and I is that we’re never affectionate.

I know how some girls frequently say “I love you” to their girl friends, plus give them long hugs and some sweet words. They may kid around every once in a while, but you could still feel that atmosphere of love around them.

This applies minimally to my clique. Since we’re birds of a feather, it translates to one thing: we’re very palengkera. We’re loud, barbaric, shameless, and a tad bit uncivilized (which, occasionally, makes me very embarrassed to be with them). We laugh all the time, and we’re very sneaky and street-smart. You may think I’m exaggerating - yes, we do conform to society’s rules, but we put a twist to it. Which, as I pointed out, makes us a bit uncivilized.

You may sense an air of affection around us - but not without sensing the air of clownishness first. See, we won’t hug one another unless it’s time to go home, and we rarely say “I love you” to one another. Both things, if done at random moments, make us laugh and cringe. We started out as a manly group of girls, and we’re still that bro towards one another.

But it’s pretty obvious that they’re going to be my friends for life.

Photo by Tine Cruz.

Votes for the future

A while ago, my parents and I went to the basketball court 3 blocks away so that we could vote. At 8 AM, the court was already filled with people waiting to get a ballot; I thought we were going to take long, but in an hour, my parents and I were done - all from casting our votes, to having an indelible ink put on our right point finger.

I heard in a TV show that we Filipinos are amongst the most suspicious when it comes to the elections. And why wouldn't we be, when over the past century, we have been cheated on over and over again? Yup, I have a nagging fear that something might not work out, and that we wouldn't get honest results. But as romantic as it may sound, I believe that everything happens for a reason. Whatever results this elections would bring, it I think would be the best outcome - maybe not for the present, but definitely for the future.

The next 6 years of my life are crucial - it's when I graduate, get a job, and achieve my dreams of travelling and trying out everything there is out there. The government plays a part in helping me do so, as the country's economic status affects how I'm going to live everyday for the next 6 years. I just hope that, if ever things wouldn't progress that much in this near future, it will be by the time I have children. So that they may enjoy a good life.

Befriending

When I was younger, I was very picky with whom to put in my circle of friends. If I find you too weird, too introverted, too cool, even, then you're out. I wanted my friends to be on my 'level', who had the same personality as I did. That way, I wouldn't have a hard time understanding them, and vice versa.

I've changed this way of thinking. Not because I've matured, but because I've experienced being rejected, too. Not super dramatic rejection, okay! :)) There were just times when I felt out of place, because people had standards I couldn't live up to - pretty similar to what I had going on then, when I was picky on whom to befriend.

Although I don't think being choosy is due to immaturity, but about us wanting to find our place in the world. We want to be with people who are like us so that we could observe how they act, think, and feel. This way, we have a better understanding of who we are and what we want.

But now, I find my place in the world by befriending everyone; after all, each and every one of us has something to offer. Why limit ourselves to those whom we could easily relate to when there are many people who could teach us a thing or two? :)

Ambitions

In the near future, I'm going to live in a different country - alone - for maybe 3 months. Such span of time is enough for me to see the sights, smell the many different aromas, and expose myself to a whole new culture. My college grades aren't the best and are pulling my hopes of achieving such dreams down, but I believe that if I could just shake the fear off, I'd be opened up to a world of possibilities.

_{Img via.}

Jeje People

I noticed how there's a massive anti-jejemon army in social networking sites such as Facebook and (the outdated) Friendster. Check around some more and you'll see other sites whose members are against the jejemons, too, like Tumblr, and even Blogger.

(Oh, in case you're unaware, jejemons are people who tYpE lYk dIs eHehE (^^,) I'm not sure how they got their name - probably because they don't laugh like eHehE anymore, but jEjEJe, instead.)

In my opinion, there's a limit to how people can exercise their freedom of speech. Yes, you can state how irritated you are by people who don't take into account proper grammar, spelling, and syntax, but you can't really judge, insult, or worst, fight them over their jEJe cApS. Come on, people. We're all much better than that.

These jejemons are still people. They eat, breathe, take a dump, experience old things and new things, experience hardships... in short, they're like us and we're like them. We're all equals.

And now, I know this doesn't apply to everyone, but wasn't there a time when we kind of typed like that, too? Maybe when we were in elementary, when that was the common way of texting our peers. Maybe we didn't use jEJe cApS, but I'm pretty sure we overused the word 'po', such as in "kumain ka na po ba? ^^" or "may kwento po ako sayo!" That was our standard; that standard still applies to other people. It's their comfortable way of expression. Do you want someone to, of the blue, disrespect you just because they don't like the way you express yourself?

Maybe education screwed us up, because many of us think that these jeje people are of a lower level than us. Come on, since when did typing improperly, mixed with the occasional baduy (which is subjective) ways of expression, equaled to being a lowlife?

These people are just doing their thing, very much like you and me. If you go out of your way just so you could insult them, then it's time to think about who really is of a lower level than the other.